"5% Sweetheart...95% Menopausal"

28 years old and menopausal...not exactly where I imagined myself.  Hot flashes, forgetfulness, and grouchyness (to be polite) is not that fun.  I found some great menopause jokes to help put things in perspective.  So the next time I freak out, roll down the window of the vehicle in -30 degree C weather, or am just plain irrational it's not my fault...it's the menopause! 
"Get YOUR attitude in check, because I can't help mine"

Is it called menopause, because every time a woman who's menopausal hears a man speak, she needs to pause or she'll clobber him?

Which is scarier, a puppy or a rational woman in menopause?

Answer:  A puppy, because a rational woman in menopause doesn't really exist.

Trusting a menopausal woman to control her emotions is like trusting a tornado to mow your lawn.

Safety Tip:  You're safer teasing a grizzly bear than telling a woman in menopause she's moody.

The most effective way to discuss a difference of opinion with a woman in menopause is to keep your mouth shut.

I know there are more...I just can't seem to remember them!?!?!?!